In a recent study, it was found that 3 out of every 5 teenagers owns a copy of the hit video game that, as it is appropiately titled, is causing a worldwide craze: Dance Dance Revolution.

In the game, players compete to be the best “dancer” that they can by stomping on various directional buttons in a specific order, and in time with a song. The game began as an arcade success, then moved on to become available for several console systems.

It was after this transition that things started to get a little… weird. “They used to just sit around on their rear ends for hours,” says Mary Oppenheim, mother of two, “but now they actually get a little exercise.”

This new game was not only fun and exciting, but it proved to be a good work-out as well.

“I’ve lost 239 pounds,” declares Benjamin Dover, a DDR Fanatic and owner of every DDR game available.

But don’t get too friendly with this great new game just yet. There is a hidden side to the supposedly innocent DDR series.

“Yeah, I was a DDR ‘freak’ for three years straight,” says one man whose name is being withheld for anonymity. “You think you’re just playing an ordinary game, but pretty soon you start waking up in the middle of the night screaming because redundant techno hits are playing over and over in your head! Every time you try to walk you feel like you’re stepping on little red, green and blue arrows that light up in front of your face! But you can’t stop playing because it’s so much fun, and all you can think about is whether or not you can reach a 200 combo.”

I guess that just goes to show you that the old saying is true: a video game is like a fine wine. When used sparingly, it can actually be quite healthy for you; when used obsessively, you’re only going to get wasted.

But still others have differing viewpoints on the game. “I believe,” says Dr. Fake, “that games such as DDR are simply being used to teach white kids rhythm.”

Certain games have recently been produced as cheap knock-offs of the hit series. Games like “Donkey Konga” utilize a pair of plastic bongos with a clap-sensing microphone to help the gamer keep the beat for a song. But games like this can’t compare with the magnitude of DDR, and will forever be only cheap replications of the original.