Two of the most ravishingly good-looking musicians I’ve ever laid eyes on, John Mayer and Sheryl Crow came to Nissan Pavilion on the Sunday evening before Labor Day. It looked like John Mayer would be the headliner (the guy who plays last), but in a startling turn of events he came out on stage just after opening act Mat Kearney, dressed in his trademark baggy cargos and a black long-sleeve. Still, he was most definitely the sexiest part of the show, playing tunes from his two previous studio albums, the upcoming “Continuum,” and also a couple John Mayer Trio songs which will be on the new record as well. Later, during Sheryl’s set, the show took another twist when she invited a special guest out on stage for her third song. It was good old Johnnie M. himself, who ripped out one of his searing, bluesy guitar solos in support.

Now don’t think I don’t love Sheryl Crow, or that she’s not at least in my top 10 of the hottest 40+ year old rock stars out there (Motley Crue’s Mick Mars being #1). It’s just… being at a John Mayer show is like nothing else. It makes your soul hurt from the strain put on it by being stretched to its limits; the funk-tacularness of the musicalness of the sounds is only just bearable and your face is about to explode the whole time. It makes you feel like Dubya would feel if his IQ was over 100. Like the Wicked Witch of the West would feel if she wasn’t allergic to water. Like the aliens from the movie Signs would feel if they weren’t… allergic to water.

As a total score and a summation of the show as a whole, I gave the concert a 4 on our Sweetcripes awesomeness scale, because I took off half a point since John didn’t play last, and another half a point since it wasn’t just Mayer playing the whole time.